Two If by Sea matches up two charismatic performers and leaves them spinning their wheels in the coastal New England mud. Denis Leary has shown a fondness for playing talkative small-time crooks from the Boston streets of his youth, which explains his collaboration on the script. But he wouldn't make this type character sing until Monument Ave. two years later, and Sandra Bullock's capable performance is not enough for the both of them, though they do generate decent chemistry. The real failure of Two If by Sea rests on the shoulders of Leary the writer, who seems uninterested in plot logistics when they interfere with the unending relationship head-butting. Maybe it's the movie's point that these two are chronically blind to the consequences of their actions, but early on, they jeopardize the safety of the painting they've just stolen -- a scene that inexplicably occurs offscreen -- to engage in an impromptu session of backseat groping. Later, when they blithely break into the home of a vacationing millionaire, they move in and make themselves comfortable without a single additional worry about getting caught. There isn't a pretense of plot-related tension -- a notable omission for a heist movie -- but there's plenty of the kind that develops between lovers unsure if they're on the right path in life. The side characters and subplots serve no more function than ballooning the running time to feature length. Unless Leary and director Bill Bennett fooled themselves into thinking they'd made an indie character study of blue-collar love, there's no excusing all the wasted time and celluloid.