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Never Steal Anything Small is a hodgepodge of a musical, a mixture of too many genres that goes in too many directions to be effective. Matters are not helped by a screenplay that fails as often as it succeeds in being witty, and by a basic immorality to the story that is flirted with but never explored. Steal is also hurt by a paucity of musical numbers. Making the characters involved in this particular story sing is a challenge in itself; it is not helped when there are so few numbers that one forgets this is a musical. The songs in Steal are also not strong enough to make the needed impression. The title number is diverting but not memorable, which is also the problem with the amusing "I'm Sorry -- I Want a Ferrari" (which is amusingly performed by James Cagney and Cara Williams.) Stars Cagney and Shirley Jones are of enormous help (although neither's musical talents are exploited to the proper extent), Hermes Pan contributes some nifty staging, and there are some isolated moments that are wonderful, but Steal is ultimately a misfire.