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Obsessing over the possibility of losing a future civilian medical position, Charles (David Ogden Stiers) vows never to speak to his colleagues at the 4077th again. Normally, Charles' silence would be a consummation devoutly to be wished, but Hawkeye (Alan Alda) and B.J. (Mike Farrell) cannot resist the temptation of jump-starting Charles' mouth. As our heroes set about to write a phony telegram in their efforts to cheer up their morose tent-mate, visiting psychiatrist Sidney (Allan Arbus) tackles the problem of an amnesiac soldier (Kevin Geer).