Synopsis by Josh Ralske
Chris Peterson (Chris Elliott) tries to teach a group of thugs how to behave, and learns a valuable lesson himself in "Bored Straight." Chris accidentally wanders into the "bad part" of Greenville, where a group of leather-jacketed hoodlums cruelly call him "Beardie," and one punches him in the stomach. Chris later complains about the deterioration of the town to his parents, Fred (Bob Elliott) and Gladys (Elinor Donahue), and vows that he's going to take back the streets. "In my heart, I know your right," Fred responds thoughtfully, "but my perfectly functioning brain says you're a horse's ass." Chris is undeterred and reaches out to the mixed-up kids, who respond by coming to his room for a "rap session." He gets them to open up by telling them about his own traumatic experience, involving his ten-year inability to shower in the nude. Unfortunately, Chris has no idea how to solve any of their problems, and quickly changes the subject. He takes the gang to a local supermarket, where, to the strains of "To Sir, With Love," they experience the life-altering joys of fresh produce. Just when Chris thinks he's had a breakthrough, he finds that the punks have tied up Fred and Gladys, stolen nearly everything of value in their house, and spray-painted the walls with vile epithets like "REAR END." Chris is still willing to give the kids the benefit of the doubt, until he discovers they've also made off with his fudgesicles. He doggedly tracks them down and makes one final effort to win over their hearts and minds.