Synopsis by Brian J. Dillard
When a mole mysteriously appears on his rear end, Steve (Jack Davenport) fears the worst. Rather than being the result of cancer, however, the blemish proves to be the cause of something worse: a huge row with Susan (Sarah Alexander) over how perfectly she and Steve have memorized each other's imperfections. Meanwhile, Jeff (Richard Coyle) nearly gets into a fight of his own -- with Joe (Marc Bannerman), the grumpy and very large ex-boyfriend of Julia (Lou Gish), his own current paramour. The trouble starts, as it often does, with a bit of kinky sex, during which Jeff accidentally swallows the key to a pair of handcuffs. Because the cuffs are currently affixed to Julia's wrist and her bedpost, hilarity ensues. But when Joe shows up to resolve some unfinished business with Julia, Jeff is anything but amused. Back at the pub, Jane (Gina Bellman) and Steve, too, fail to see the humor when it's revealed that Jane's new boyfriend once dated Susan in college. Originally broadcast October 21, 2002, on BBC2, "The Freckle, the Key and the Couple Who Weren't" marked season three, episode five of the hit Britcom.