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To impress his erstwhile sweetheart Romenia, who simply adores a man in uniform, village idiot Ernest T. Bass tries to join the army, only to be turned down flat. Outraged, Ernest T. goes on another of his rock-throwing frenzies, threatening to break every window in North Carolina. Attempting to mollify Ernest, Andy and Barney discover that, so far as Romenia is concerned, any uniform will do-even one of Barney's hand-me-downs. Written by Jim Fritzell and Everett Greenbaum, "Ernest T. Bass Joins the Army" first aired on October 14, 1963.